Cold Feet

There are a few of my couples who have experienced cold feet. They go through all of the planning, start looking at the costs, think about how their lives will change, what they will have to do to keep a marriage on course, and they go into a panic. Rarely does this stop them from going through with the wedding, but it can create some very uncomfortable days until everything is back on target.

Planning and communication are the sure-fire ways of making these things work out. By working together, making sure all of the bases are covered for the wedding itself, talking about what has been accomplished, what has yet to be done, talking about the feelings that you have, including how the ceremony and reception will affect your finances, you come to realize what a great team you are, how you solve problems, and that together, you can overcome whatever is before you.
You may find that you have to prioritize desires for your ceremony. Some thing are very important to each of you, other things you can let go of without it negatively affecting you on an emotional level. Some things are just beyond your budget. Part of being a mature, married couple is knowing when you have to make do with what you have. If you have your heart set on something, you may have to make a trade-off. Together, you can make these choices.

The thing that you must avoid at all costs is manipulation. Don’t try to deceive one another or surprise one another with what you think your partner wants or something that you want, but you think you will be able to trick your partner into wanting in the end. This is a sign that you have some growing to do, and you need to face that.

Marriage is about making an unstoppable team. You can be a part of it, or you can break it. What choice will you make?
Warm regards,
Rev. Sandra

Winter Weddings

Winter weddings take a little more planning than those carefree, rain-free summer days, but they offer a chance to really let your creativity shine. As most winter weddings are, as a necessity here in the North, indoors, the decor becomes part of the memory and effect that you wish to create. Consider going to the dollar stores where you can find silk flowers, ribbon, crepe paper, etc. to make decorations that will be stunning to your guests and easy on your pocketbook. Afraid they will look cheap, just because they are? Once put together they will dazzle your guests just as much as high-priced decorations. Just employ your imagination and let yourself enjoy the savings.

Ready, Set, Go!

Perhaps winter is not the time that is optimal for having a wedding, but it is the right time to start planning for a springtime wedding or even your summer wedding. Now is the time to get your vendors lined up, and soon! Their calendars will start to fill in very quickly now.

Your officiant is perhaps the first person you wish to contact. Not only does she have a great deal of work to do to prepare your ceremony, (especially if she is writing a fresh ceremony, as opposed to using the ol' standby from the Book of Common Prayer) but she will be able to help you plan your wedding. She can answer questions you may have, act as a springboard for ideas, and share her experience. She has a unique vantage point from which to observe the goings on at weddings, including fashion trends and cutting edge ceremonies. Since she performs about 50 weddings a season, that's a well of information that you want to tap.

Of course, there are a lot of things that you will need to plan beyond the ceremony itself, and these are best handled with the caterer, the decorator, the musicians, the baker, and so forth. But for now, you can get started with the most experienced advisor you can have--your officiant.

About Rev. Sandra

I have been ordained as a non-denominational minister in the State of Michigan for 11 years and have been performing wedding ceremonies/commitments for 9 years now. I have performed over 300 unique and beautiful ceremonies.

Why do I do this? Because I love being around happy couples on a day that means so much to them, and I derive great joy in helping them create a beautiful memory that will be with them for the rest of their lives.

I believe that the most important thing on Wedding Day is that the two of you have a ceremony that you can look back on with fondness because it speaks to who you are as a couple and the feelings that you have for each other.

I use the symbolism that is meaningful for you, that tells your guests where you are going in your lives, help you select rituals that symbolize your unity and love, and touch your guests hearts.

I believe it is not necessary to have a ceremony that lasts hours to bring out the true story of your lives, past, present and future. The beauty that reveals the two of you takes little time and is even more memorable because of it.

I am located in Muskegon, Michigan, however, I would be happy to refer you to someone in your area who holds similar philosophies regarding weddings, via the American Association of Wedding Officiants.